"Aargh in Elfyatnik" by Andrey Belyanin, summary

Andrey Belyanin’s humorous fantasy novel "Aargh in Elfyatnik" was published in 2010. The story is told from the perspective of a thoughtful and literate member of a warrior race — an Aargh named Malysh — whose interest in reading philosophical works coexists with his work as a bodyguard. The plot develops the traditional story of mercenaries through an ironic examination of the customs of the Empire’s borderlands.

The book is the second part of the Aargh series, where the first book was the novel Aargh (2008), and the final one was Aargh on the Stage (2010).

Events in the tavern and a new assignment

Aargh the Kid lives in a mountain settlement with his employer, a carefree capital aristocrat, Count Ashley Elgenhauer Jr. The heroes head to the border establishment of the seasoned mercenary Truvor. Two dwarves, brothers Turom and Neturom, join the company at the tavern.

The meeting is marred by the appearance of the wood elf Elander. The regulars dislike the elves because of the constant attacks on travelers by forest bandits. A mass brawl breaks out in the hall. The innkeeper pushes the friends into the wine cellar, saving them from the enraged crowd.

Suddenly, a fiery dragon, led by a rider in black robes, attacks the establishment. The monster burns the inn to the ground. Truvor mourns the loss of his property. Count Ashley pours out the remains of his gold and forces his companions to chip in to build a new tavern.

The servant Elsa recalls that the dragon rider looked like the Priest of Evil. Elander admits he came to hire the Kid for elven gold. The pointy-eared guide offers a generous reward for a dangerous mission through the Fire Wastes to save the elven people.

Pursuit and skirmish on the farm

The detachment advances along the forest edge. On the road, the friends spot fifty Imperial secret police soldiers under the command of an officer with a red armband. The mercenaries take cover in the undergrowth, then disarm two horsemen and steal their horses.

The Kid and Ashley are riding horseback when a police commander blocks their path. The officer refuses to answer questions and draws his sword. Aargh breaks the opponent’s blade and ties the rider upside down under the horse’s belly.

The party stops for the night at the Lame Dog Inn. There, the mercenary Sun and the wandering mage Carlanius join the group. The child takes a book from the wizard about the dangers of witchcraft. That night, Aargh and Sun are attacked by an assassin wearing a wolf’s tooth amulet and a blue lizard tattoo on his neck. The mercenary kills the attacker.

After a day’s journey, the heroes find the lonely farmstead of Pegoy and his mute mother. At night, the owners hang out a wolverine tail, luring a gang of black orcs. The mercenaries repel the night assault. Pegoy’s mother tries to plunge a knife into Baby’s throat, but Count Ashley saves the aargh by stabbing the old woman with his rapier.

Crossing the sands and underground of Khnar

The bandit company sets fire to the bandit farmstead and gives the livestock to the poor. At the edge of the Fire Wastes, the Evil Priest’s dragon flies over the mercenaries and destroys a rat roasted by the dwarves with its flames. Escaping the day’s heat, the travelers move across the scorching sands.

Elander leads the friends to the first key point — a gigantic ancient sculpture. The dwarves cut an entrance through the bronze head’s eye socket, and the party descends into the shelter. That night, the heroes are attacked by a browed snake. The child strangles the monster with his hands.

A flock of blade-toothed jerboas descends upon the snake’s corpse. Fleeing them, the squad makes their way outside. In the sands, the mercenaries encounter the assassins who had been lying in wait for them. The dwarves bury one of the attackers in the scorching sand. The captive confesses that they were hired by an Evil Priest with a lizard mark.

The travelers reach the second landmark — marble columns. The Kid accidentally triggers a mechanism, and the top of the column rises, revealing an entrance to a metal pipe. The mercenaries descend. An Evil Priest appears and breathes flames into the pipe, but the Kid knocks down the inner door, and the heroes escape through the tunnel.

In the dungeon’s fireplace room, the party discovers the remains of elven guards. They are surrounded by a flock of hnar — predatory monsters with female skulls. Count Ashley cunningly provokes a fight between the monsters, after which the Kid smashes them with an oak table.

Rescue from the Elven Oasis

Moving through the dungeon, the Kid climbs out of a hatch and sees a bonfire. The mage Carlanius and his mercenaries are holding the enchanted Sun. Aargh takes the girl and returns to the tunnel. Sun comes to, severely exhausted from the spell.

The tunnel leads the group to a hidden oasis, serving as a refuge for elven children. The elders announce the purpose of the expedition: to transport a girl named Eivyn, gifted with the gift of foresight, to the safety of Ravenfield. The girl warns of an approaching flame.

The children are hidden in a cave. The Evil Priest flies into the oasis on a half-dead dragon. The elder elves perish in the battle, but they break the mage’s spirit. The enchanted Sun belches a stream of flame at the Enemy, setting him ablaze. The charred Carlanius leaps into the lake, and the dragon dies.

The mercenaries bury the fallen defenders in the cave. The child places Eivin on his shoulders. To avoid leaving the children unprotected, the squad takes the entire "elven hutch" with them and leaves through an underground passage.

The Path Through the Cursed Twilight

The dwarves block the tunnel entrance with rocks. The surviving Carlanius attempts to break through the barrier and sends undead after the heroes. The mercenaries destroy the corpses and destroy the dungeon’s vaults.

The squad enters the Cursed Twilight, an anomalous zone filled with ancient spells. Elander steps on a spell and gains a wooden leg, Turom turns into a bearded toad, and Neturom into a stone boulder. The kid suffers paralysis, but Sun, in dragon form, catches him. After stepping on the dispelling spell, the mercenary and the others return to their normal forms.

The heroes reach the forest. Eivin predicts an attack by a flock of bats. Ashley orchestrates a ruse: cloaks are placed under the sand to resemble sleeping bodies. The bats drop their daggers into empty daggers.

The siege of the inn and the finale

The mercenaries lead the children to an inn on the highway. The innkeeper turns out to be an accomplice of the secret police. The squad takes up defensive positions on the second floor. Horsemen in black cloaks set the gates on fire and storm the building. Elander shoots the attackers from the window.

In the midst of the battle, Carlanius appears and wounds Eivin with a crossbow bolt. The wizard stops time for everyone except the Kid. The Evil Priest removes the bolt and heals the girl with blue fire. The wizard reveals that Eivin is his biological daughter with the elf Naela.

The child releases Carlanius. Time is reset, and a detachment of elven archers from Raven’s Heath arrives to help. The elves finish off the remaining enemies.

Eivin sets off with his kin to Raven’s End. The elder pays the mercenaries the agreed-upon gold reward. The company bids farewell to the elven children.

On the riverbank, Malysh sets up a date with Sun. The friends help Aargh get ready. Malysh and Sun confess their feelings for each other and hug, realizing their journey together is just beginning.