A summary of "Mother-in-Law’s Diary" by Maria Metlitskaya
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This book is a true-life story, written in 2012. It centers on an ordinary Moscow family, whose only son, Danila, announces his intention to marry. The story is told from the perspective of his mother, Elena. She shares her personal experiences and reflections as she attempts to build a relationship with her daughter-in-law. The story is interspersed with numerous real-life stories from other families, revealing the psychological aspects of the complex coexistence of two generations.
In 2015, an eight-part television film of the same name was made based on this story. Directed by Leonid Mazor, the film starred Evgeniya Dmitrieva, Olga Pavlovets, and Alexander Arsentyev. The adaptation received warm reviews from viewers for its warmth and humor.
This work opens the author’s renowned book series "Behind Other People’s Windows." This ongoing project also includes other popular stories by the writer, exploring women’s lives and family dramas.
Family council and meeting with matchmakers
The narrator, Elena, lives in Moscow with her husband, Pavel, a history professor, and their twenty-three-year-old son, Danila. Upon learning of her son’s decision to marry a woman named Nyusya, Elena suggests the young couple live together in a civil partnership. Her son’s chosen one is offended. The future mother-in-law is forced to give in, realizing that for the sake of peace in the family, she will have to adapt to her daughter-in-law’s personality.
A home-cooked dinner is organized to introduce the bride’s parents. The Ivasyukis — former Lieutenant Colonel Valery Petrovich and his wife Zoya Ivanovna — are guests. Nyusya’s father insists on holding the wedding at a restaurant attached to a military unit in Novomoskovsk. He promises to transport the guests in an old bus. Elena firmly rejects this idea, insisting on holding the celebration at a respectable establishment in Moscow.
Wedding preparations and celebrations in Moscow
Elena’s friend, the energetic entrepreneur Lala, is in charge of choosing the bride’s gown. She takes the women to a salon, where she helps Nyusya choose an elegant dress the color of a faded tea rose. The bride’s mother, Zoya Ivanovna, is initially upset by the modest style of the dress and the lack of a full veil, but eventually agrees with her daughter’s choice.
The wedding is taking place at an inexpensive Moscow restaurant. A colorful group of guests gathers among the guests. Mother-in-law Tamara Arkadyevna ceremoniously presents the newlyweds with an envelope containing five hundred dollars. Pavel’s cousin Albina, an eccentric unmarried woman, presents them with a ridiculous Georgian coin. Nyusya quickly tires of the noisy merriment and decisively stops shouting "Bitter!" After the celebration, the young couple flies off to Spain for a vacation.
Elena’s experience of her first marriage
As Elena prepares for her son’s marriage, she recalls her own youth. At eighteen, she married the handsome Terentiy, nicknamed Tarzan. Her husband turned out to be a lazy slacker. He worked as a security guard and preferred to spend his time drinking with his friends.
Terentiy lived in a separate co-op apartment purchased by his mother, Stella Rudolfovna. Stella was a stylish woman, far removed from domestic concerns, but she treated Elena with understanding. The marriage lasted only eight months. When Elena’s parents arrived at the apartment and found them having yet another party, they silently took their daughter home. Elena never saw Terentiy again.
Everyday life of a young family and the birth of a grandson
The newlyweds return from Spain and settle into Elena and Pavel’s apartment. Life is difficult. Nyusya shirks all household chores, sleeps late, and leaves dirty dishes behind. It soon becomes clear that her daughter-in-law is pregnant. Elena takes charge of her diet and health.
After the birth of her grandson Ilyusha, things become tense. Nyusya refuses to breastfeed the child in favor of drinking and smoking. The boy suffers from severe diathesis. The young mother spends her days out with her local friend Nastya, leaving the care of the crying infant to her mother-in-law.
Family crisis and unexpected ending of marriage
To save their family from constant squabbles, Elena and Pavel rent a separate apartment for the newlyweds. Zoya Ivanovna, who comes from the Moscow region, often helps with the baby. But soon Nyusya leaves for a vacation in Turkey. From Kemer, she sends Danila a message about having met a new love — the bartender Kemal.
Nyusya demands a divorce and refuses to return to Russia. Her father, Valery Petrovich, suffers a severe stroke from the stress. Elena quits her job to care for Ilyusha. With the help of an experienced lawyer, the family manages to formally renounce Nyusya’s custody rights for a large sum of money.
Elena is helped by Valechka, a lonely and compassionate woman from the neighboring house who cares for her blind, elderly mother. Valechka becomes Ilyusha’s reliable nanny. She takes the boy for walks, allowing Elena to catch her breath.
Danila’s new hobbies and Polina’s arrival
Danila begins a whirlwind romance with the beautiful Maryana, the Sorbonne-educated daughter of an oil oligarch. Elena feels like an outsider at a lavish family dinner at a country mansion. Maryana’s father is planning a lavish wedding at a chateau in France. Just before leaving, Elena breaks her leg, sparing her the trouble of attending the celebration.
Danila’s marriage to Maryana falls apart just as quickly as his first. The son returns to his parents in a dejected state. Gradually, he recovers, begins actively raising Ilyusha, and finds a new job. A modest and caring woman, Polina, enters his life.
Polina quickly finds common ground with Ilyusha. Soon, the newlyweds announce they are expecting a baby. Grandmother Tamara Arkadyevna decides to trade in her large apartment to provide Danila and Polina with their own place. Long-awaited peace and quiet reign in the family.
Wise life stories
Elena recalls the fates of her friends and acquaintances, whose family dramas help her understand her own fate more deeply. Her friend Ninka married a Muscovite with a domineering mother. Wanting to be of service, Ninka dug up a well-kept lawn at her mother-in-law’s dacha to plant potatoes. The family scandal was resolved only thanks to her husband’s wisdom.
Another story tells of Kapitolina Ivanovna, a lover of antique porcelain and antiques. Her son married a dull but brilliant scientist named Dina. Kapitolina tried to shower her daughter-in-law with expensive gifts and mink coats. Dina cried under this obsessive attention until her son asked his mother to accept her as she was.
I also recall the case of Marta’s friend, whose mother-in-law, Yadviga Vasilyevna, harassed her daily over the phone with nagging. She compared Marta to her son’s ex-wife. Marta’s patience snapped when she bluntly told her mother-in-law to go to hell. After that, Yadviga became polite and cautious.
The fates of German and Moscow mothers-in-law
Sonya, her friend, initially lived in Munich with her German husband, Olaf. His mother, Annegret, deprived her son of money because of her foreign daughter-in-law. Sonya cared for her ailing mother-in-law after a broken hip with such care that she decided to sign over her entire fortune to her. Sonya renounced her inheritance and returned to her homeland.
Sonya’s second marriage to Mitya landed her in the apartment of her mother-in-law, nicknamed "Frog." She constantly feigned heart attacks. After the divorce, "Frog" bequeathed her apartment to a caregiver, but Sonya’s friends managed to get it back through the courts. These stories prove that human relationships are always broader than any stereotypes.
Rules of mutual understanding
Elena distills her life observations into practical advice for future mothers-in-law. She urges respect for the young couple’s privacy and refrain from visiting them unannounced. A mother-in-law should remember her own youthful mistakes and make allowances for her daughter-in-law’s inexperience.
It’s important to praise your daughter-in-law’s culinary skills, not to interfere with your own rules in someone else’s kitchen, and never criticize your wife in front of your son. In any dispute, Elena believes it’s best to side with justice rather than blindly defend her child. Money is always the best gift, as the tastes of different generations rarely coincide.
Relationships require patience and the ability to forgive minor offenses. A mother-in-law’s wisdom lies in her ability to temper her pride for the sake of her son’s happiness. Ultimately, the well-being of a young family depends on the tact and generosity of spirit of the older generation.
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